magellaniccloud's Journal

aimless ramblings
I don't feel like working, dammit, so I'm not going to. My ever-nosey cubemate is off to her massage appointment, and as soon as the people across from me leave, I am as good as OUTTA HERE.

Funny how work seems like prison when I have nothing to do. And the longer my boredom continues, the more grouchy I get when someone asks me to do something. Why is that?

But let me tell you, I am happy as a clam to have this job! Yeah, it's not much for stimulation these days, but hey, I'll take the paycheck!

I keep forgetting to bring in my Java book to learn it on the company's time and dime. Next week.

Let's see... maybe I should do a status check on all things Jen.
- work: status quo. nothing bad going on, but nothing particularly good, except that it looks like we won't be getting delisted off Nasdaq. Phew. Every day I'm happy to come in and experience that my job is still here. Every single day.

- home: ok, but there's some new HOA drama that I've been choosing to ignore. We got a new management company and they are unhelpful to say the least. The board president is furious, and I support her fury, but I choose not to stress about it. We have a meeting next week. Should be interesting. But otherwise, the condo is great. I love my home. I really, really do.

- kitties: they are fantastic. So loving! I need to take them to the vet for a checkup, though. I haven't due to financial issues. I should put this on the list of things I'll do when I get my tax refund.

- car: had some car drama last week, but knock on wood, it seems pretty good now. There was a strange noise this morning - kind of like a marble going around and around in a tin can and went faster as I accelerated - but it stopped. Phew! I have a new alarm now and a keyless remote that works! I am psyched about that! And I replaced the iPod that got stolen a few weeks ago. All is well!

- social life: I have been BUSY! There has been a lot of Susan stuff lately because of her upcoming wedding and her Cabi business, but it's all been fun. I'm hosting a party for her in a few weeks, and I'm sleeping over with her the night before the wedding. I've been hanging with Toad quite a bit, too, and have been emailing Lynne almost daily due to the iPod I gave her for her birthday - she had some setup issues. I haven't felt too overwhelmed with the social stuff yet, but I'm trying not to overdo it! I haven't seen Sophie and the kids in a few weeks... hard to fit them in too!

- WeightWatchers: Well, I've fallen off the wagon food-wise. I'm continuing my daily workouts, but dang, I get HUNGRY. And it doesn't help that I'm bored as a piece of wood at work. Plus, I've been going out to dinner a LOT. That's got to stop.

- Exercise: I need to give myself a HUGE pat on the back here - I'm just a few days away from going 6 straight months in my daily workout regimen! I think today was Day 180. My Polar heart rate monitor was my 6 month reward to myself. That and some new water bottles. That HRM rocks! I can upload all my workout data - heart rate info (Max, Avg), calories burned, length of workout, time of day - to a webpage diary they have. It's not the fanciest thing ever, but it is VERY cool to be able to have a record of my workouts accesible over the web with no typing required!

- Body: Despite falling off the WeightWatchers wagon the past 2 weeks, my body is still doing well. I'm hovering around the same weight for about 3 weeks now, but I'm not sweating it. This is a good weight. But I am still 8lbs from goal. Close, but...

- Spirit: I've been a little disconnected this week, and it might just be because I've been busy with car stuff, social life, and rev. I catch myself though. Detaching the faceplate to my car stereo every time I park it makes it much more likely that I'll drive without the radio on. This is when I realize I've been disconnected from my "self". I drive in silence, then, and strive to stay connected without having my mind wander off. It's not easy.

- Shopping: I've done well with the shopping habit the past 1-2 weeks, but I have that huge charge from my mechanic. I had to blow away the little progress I'd made on my savings to pay that charge. Still, it's nice to have it paid. I haven't bought any clothes in awhile, though. Oh, wait. I bought a couple of fitness tops as part of my 6 month reward. Does that count?

- love life: Haven't been dating and it's been very nice. Fuck dating.

- rev: Dare I say that things have been great lately? I've been staying at his place nearly every night, and he's been cuddly, attentive, and sweet. Not sure what's up with that, but I'm not complaining! He's also been clean and sober since 1/1. And he might have a job. Not that that has anything to do with me, but it might put him in a better general mood. I have to say, though, he's been quite upbeat! I've been the grumpy one! Mostly from lack of sleep. I really wish he'd come to my place once in awhile, but on the other hand, for some reason, it's easier for me to get to the gym on weekdays from his place. I get distracted while getting ready to go at my place. But I do get to the gym earlier.

Life is good in general. I'm enjoying this time of relative calm. I told my therapist a few weeks ago that I used to live in a perpetual state of severe anxiety, especially as a teenager. It was all I could do to get through my classes, even though I did well in school. I don't have that anxiety anymore. I feel pretty good, actually. I've made my own security. Status-quo is good, it's nice, it's what I want right now. Maybe someday I'll want more. But right now, I just want this. Exactly what I have.

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